Trusting your inner wisdom isn't always easy, but if you don't you will miss out on experiences in life. This is my story about trusting myself and my inner wisdom, and three ways that you can start listening to and trusting yourself more.
Full disclosure: I’ve never really trusted myself.
I’m not proud of this.
And besides that, this not trusting myself has caused me problems my entire life.
But I’ve changed all that.
I’ve learned that rather than going back and forth and making myself crazy, I've learned to take a breath and listen to myself.
So, for instance.
When I really want to do something and that desire keeps nagging at me, I know that this is something I must do.
I’ve never gone wrong by listening to my desires.
But it’s hard to sort out why I hold back unless I give myself a chance to sort it out...what’s keeping me from just doing that thing that I want to do?
When I get out my journal and have this conversation with myself, I hear all the doubts about what's holding me back and it’s usually about some ridiculous fear.
Let me demonstrate what I mean:
A few years ago my sons and I were in New Zealand. We had an opportunity to go up in a floatplane and fly over Auckland and float down into Auckland harbour.
And it was all free. Plus I’d be going with my sons.
But there was a problem.
I hate flying in small planes.
There was room for 3 passengers and the pilot.
The boys said, “Mom, do you want to go?”
The voice inside me said, “Don’t do it. That’s a crazy thing to do. The plane could crash and then you’d all be dead.”
I never said this out loud and I tried to be nonchalant and said casually,
So they offered it to one of our friends.
The next morning…the day of the flight, I walked into the kitchen to find my boys getting ready. They said, “Gustavo isn’t going, Mom.” We’re leaving in about 15 minutes.
Thoughts swirled around in my head. Should I go?
I could go. I want to. I should go.
But there’s only 10 minutes to get dressed (I was standing in my nightgown).
“But, wait, the saboteur voices said, “remember what we said yesterday: what if the plane crashes and we all go down?”...the voices were not happy with me.
Deep down inside I knew, I just knew I’d regret it if I didn’t go.
Then I heard a quiet voice inside me say, “Just go, Jo.”
It was clear what I would do. I trusted myself that I’d be okay to go and get on that plane...no matter what.
I raced to my room, threw on the first thing I could find, brushed my teeth, and ran a comb through my hair, reaching for my backpack.
The next thing I knew I was in the car with my kids driving to that plane, the one that had floats attached to it, the one that was soooo tiny.
Before we took off, the boys were asked to help pump out the bilge (or I think that’s what it was). While they were busy, I calmly walked around taking pictures.
What happened was...
I had a blast.
We flew over Auckland and we were able to see everything. It was stunning.
The landing was easy and smooth...right on the water in the harbour.
Just like that.
No crash, just a very fun time with my kids.
Had I let the saboteurs take over and had I not really listened to what I really wanted, I would have missed an unforgettable experience with my boys.
Here are my 3 tips for you when you really want to trust yourself but you’re afraid:
Start today to trust that part of yourself underneath everything.
After all, who knows you better than you?
Over to you:
When have you not listened to what you really desired?
When did you trust yourself and it was exactly the right thing to do?
Post in the comments and let me know your story about trusting yourself.
If you struggle to fully trust yourself, I have something that I think will help.
It’s my “How much do you really trust yourself” assessment. It’s free and you’ll get action steps to take according to your score. Click on the link here to take this quiz.
Fall is a time for us to slow down, to ground ourselves and to nourish our bodies. This retreat is designed to help you stop and listen to what it is you need right now. It's a fun and restorative weekend with mindfulness exercises, morning yoga, an online cooking class with the fabulous Chef Bai, healthy recipes to try at home, meditations and group calls to connect you with other women.