We Are Tired. We Are Rising

 Women are angry, and most of us were never taught what to do with that kind of anger and power.

We are saying it out loud now. We are pissed off. We are done swallowing it. And yet many of us are also unsure where to put it, how to use it, how to rise without burning ourselves out.

We're Angry and We're Done Hiding It

I'm less angry today.  I have been so, so mad this week. 

But I am tired.

Tired of the onslaught.
Tired of waking up to another outrage.
Tired of feeling like every day requires vigilance.

I'm sick of all of it.

And yet I love hearing women say, “I’m pissed off.”

I love it when a woman finally says, “I’m angry.”

Not apologizing.
Not softening it.
Not stuffing it down to keep the peace.

The Good Girl Story Is Breaking

For decades, we women have kept things even keel. We have swallowed what we really thought. We have carried the emotional weight for everyone around us. We have been the good girls.

But now something is breaking open.

Maybe what all of this corruption and cruelty is doing is calling women forward. Calling us to rise up with that ancient power that lives in our bodies.

The same power that births children.
The same power that does everything for our families.
The same power that endures pain and keeps going.

We've been holding it down for generations. Now it's erupting.

Ella Is Watching

Yesterday I spoke with my granddaughter, Ella, in Vanuatu. She's almost twelve. Thoughtful. Observant. Watching the world closely.

She told me she had seen the photos Trump posted about the Obamas as monkeys on the news. I was shocked, because this is a tiny island nation. Even there, thousands of miles away, she heard about this obscenity. 

We talked about racism and power. We talked about how some leaders use cruelty.  

We talked about what it means to stand up for something you believe in. I asked her what she would protest against.  I said, "Would you protest if people were hurting children?" She said "YES!"

"Would you protest if people were against gay people?" "YES," she answered without hesitation.  

I said, "Ella, one day you might ask me, Gran, what did you do when all this bad stuff was happening?”

And I told her the truth.

I write so people will be aware.
I call my representatives every day.
I show up at marches.

I teach women to let go of self-doubt.
I refuse to stay quiet.

Part of me felt grief that she even has to think about these things at her age.

But I also felt pride.

Pride that she asks questions.
Pride that she thinks critically.
Pride that she is learning to trust herself and her opinions. 

I don’t want Ella or any of my granddaughters growing up believing they have to be small to be safe.

I do not want my granddaughters inheriting a world where powerful men exploit children and face no consequences.

We Will Not Look Away

We must not look away from corruption. We must not look away from the abuse of power. We must not look away from policies that strip rights from women. 

Looking away is how this continues.

But here is the part we rarely talk about.

What Do We Do With All This Anger?

If we don't channel it, it burns us out. It spills into our relationships. It settles into our nervous systems. It leaves us exhausted and reactive.

Anger is not the enemy.

It is energy.

And energy needs direction.

Love Is Not Soft This Year

On Valentine’s Day, love looks different for me this year.

Not roses.
Not candy hearts.
Not pretending everything is fine.

Love looks like taking care of myself so I can stay in this for the long haul.

Love looks like closing the laptop. Taking a break from scrolling. Turning the phone off hours before bed. Listening to my body when it says enough.

Love looks like forgiving myself for not being able to fix everything.

I believe part of what I am doing in these blog posts is giving women permission.

Permission to name their anger.
Permission to feel it and to own it.
Permission to stop swallowing it whole.

We were never taught how to use our anger wisely. We were taught to suppress it. To smile. To be agreeable. To keep the peace.

But anger, when grounded, is clarity.

It tells us what matters.

This is what rising looks like: Not frantic. Not screaming into the void.
Not burning yourself out.

Steady.
Clear.
Rooted in something deeper than rage.

Rest. Then Rise.

When you are rested, get back in the game.  

Do whatever you are called to do, but do one thing every day. 

Call your representatives.  5Calls.org
Show up locally with Indivisible.org
Protect voting rights… this will be a fierce fight for the midterms
Pay attention to the ways access might quietly be limited.
Refuse to normalize cruelty.

Take your rage and use it the way you would use it to protect your children. 

Speak the truth.

And when you start to feel hopeless, that is your cue to step back and regulate. Not to give up. To recalibrate.

We cannot afford burnout.

We also cannot afford silence.

We are tired.

But we are rising.

For the Ones Who Come After Us

I’m not only thinking about my granddaughters. I’m thinking about the women and girls I will never meet. The ones who will live with the consequences of what we tolerate or resist.

The ones who will study this moment in history and wonder who stood up.

We are tired. But we are rising for them, too.

OVER TO YOU:

Are you angry?  Are you tired?

What small act of courage feels right for you this week?

You don't have to do everything.

But you do have to decide who you are becoming in this moment.