“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace; if you let go a lot you will have a lot of peace; if you let go completely you will have complete peace." Ajahn Chah
When I heard this quote the very first time, it stopped me dead in my tracks.
I knew it was true.
But I didn’t have much experience with letting go.
I come from a family who loved to keep things. Everything, actually.
There wasn’t a whole lot that got thrown away. Letters, old bank statements and checks for years and years, clothes that no longer fit, even empty boxes...because, well, the idea was that we might need these things SOMEDAY.
And yes, my parents were of the Depression-era. I get it.
It was a time that affected that generation for their entire lives and my parents and grandparents were deeply impacted along with everyone else. They didn’t believe in getting rid of anything.
So I grew up with the mentality of keeping things, unaware and unsuspecting that I thought the same way. I didn’t realize how paralyzing not being able to let go was.
Now I know that having too much stuff can really keep you stuck in ways you may not even realize.
Especially when you’ve had role modeling of the fear of “not enough” so best to keep everything.
But we’re in a totally different age now.
We’re on the opposite side of the fence. Most of us have too much of everything.
And we’re holding on to stuff that isn’t good for us unconsciously...not just the physical stuff, but the emotional and mental as well.
The downside of all of it is that it strangles you.
It keeps you from having what you really want in life.
Sometimes we know we need to declutter and let go of the physical stuff but we don’t have the time to go through it all and get rid of what we don’t need anymore.
So we keep putting it off.
Yet, I think there’s something else underneath the not letting go of clutter.
It has to do with fear.
Fear that we won’t have enough or be able to create what we need when we need it.
That fear plays monkey mind with us and says we won't be able to figure out what to do, how to make money, and then scarcity thinking sets in.
We tell ourselves the lie: I might need it someday.
Letting go sometimes means facing uncomfortable realizations.
Maybe you paid a lot of money for something. And then you realized it didn’t really make you happy. And now you think if I let go of it, then I have to admit it was folly to buy it. And that can bring up negative feelings of self-judgment and shame.
If I let go of this friendship/relationship that isn’t good for me, I have to let go of feeling guilty, that it will hurt their feelings.
If I let go of things or thoughts that I have, I'd have to let go of thinking I have control...which as we all know (think of the pandemic) can come unexpectedly and obliterate our best-laid plans.
If I keep all the stuff that clogs up my life...physical or mental, it keeps me stuck and I might miss new opportunities coming into my life.
The other side of letting go is peace.
Peace will come if you let go of:
The stuff that you don’t love or need anymore
Of worrying what others think of you
Of not feeling good enough
Peace comes when you don’t have to control everything around you (including the people in your life).
The only control we really have is actually how we're going to choose to think about our life and what happens.
Call it peace or freedom. It’s a lot better than holding on.
What do you need to let go of?
Is it clutter? A relationship that isn’t good for you? What other people think of you? The negative thoughts about yourself?
Whatever it is, I support you 100% in letting go of that thing TODAY.
Also...I invite you to join me in letting go of what you don't need in your life anymore.
I’ll guide you to declutter in just 10 minutes a day! It's so easy and fun. This challenge will fire you up and help you get rid of all the stuff you don't want anymore AND help you bring in what you do want into your life.
Join me and let go of the things that hold you back!
Don't want to declutter in a group? Maybe you have something bigger to let go of…mental or emotional clutter.
I’m offering private coaching sessions to help you declutter whatever you need to in your life.
Work with me 1:1 to reach your declutter goals. Go here and make an appointment with me today. Don't wait.
Fall is a time for us to slow down, to ground ourselves and to nourish our bodies. This retreat is designed to help you stop and listen to what it is you need right now. It's a fun and restorative weekend with mindfulness exercises, morning yoga, an online cooking class with the fabulous Chef Bai, healthy recipes to try at home, meditations and group calls to connect you with other women.